58 Things I Learned While Being Home Alone: Nos. 49-40

Seems like it was just yesterday when I was writing about my first 8 days. Now I’m already 22 days in, with 36 more to go! Not bad! Time’s starting to fly!

As mentioned before I’ve been learning a lot of things while my wife and kids are on the lower part of the world. To countdown the days they were gone I thought I would post a daily ticker with one thing I learned each day. Sometimes I’ve actually learned something (SEE: No. 57), sometimes I’ve just made a full of myself (SEE: No. 55) and sometimes it’s just been nonsense.

I posted Nos. 58-50 here. Now it’s time to update you all on Nos. 49-40. Try to hold back your excitement!

#49 – I’m no longer in my early 20s. I can no longer do back-to-back late nights and feel “normal” the next day. And hanging out with Brazilians makes me miss my Brazilians even more!

Like everyone else I stayed up late on the 4th of July, which made Thursday tough. Well Thursday night my buddy Shandy asked me if I wanted to go out with him at a club in Seattle where he plays in a samba band. I agreed as we’ve talked about this for years now. Well like everything Brazilian it started late and ended late. But it was fun! By the time we got home it was close to 3am. I crashed on their sofa and Friday was painful.

Note: I would later do the same thing this past weekend at the Sultan Shindig, this time staying up until 5am at a bonfire by two of my ex-clients! We’ll get to that later!

Oh, and the missing my Brazilians part … you know you’re old when you’re watching Brazilians shake their thangs (and if you know Brazilians you know they have thangs, I can tell if someone is Brazilian by looking at their hips down. Great hips, great legs, great …), anyway, you know you’re old when you’re watching Brazilians dance and the first thing you think of is how one day your daughter will be dancing like this. She’s already got the hip-shaking, bunda-moving walk that nobody on my side of the family can claim.

#48 – The dishes don’t wash themselves and the trash doesn’t take itself out!

OK, so this bit was from Josh, but it’s true. The dishes were stacked, the trash needed taken out and I needed to do it. Does Lis do all this? Yes, and no. I’ll take out the trash when needed. Now the dishes! She’s OCD about that. I mean she’s washing dishes before the four of us are cleaning our plates. She’s just a step down from her Mom who’s washing your dish while you eat. I could use this again as the dishes are stacked worse than when I posted this two weeks ago!

#47 – Boyz II Men are shorter than expected!

If you’ve read my blog you know the story. If you haven’t then see below or click here. I figured my man, Shawn Stockman, was at least 6-feet. Negative. They were short, but larger than life in my book!

#46 – You can scream and yell but there’s no one to come to your rescue when you run out of TP.

Lucky for me it was only in one bathroom! But, yes this did happen! I ran out of paper, looked around and thought, “Well, this bites.” There was no Lukas or Lia to come assist me. Yah, Lis doesn’t help me out with this. I can get a faster response from one of the kids. But that usually means they stick around longer than they should.

#45 – I can leave the front door open and not have to worry about Levi attempting to escape the asylum by walking through the hole in the screen door.

It’s been muggy here, so one afternoon I decided I was going to do something we haven’t done in a while – open the front door. Check that, I did open it once only to have a slight scare when I realized I couldn’t find our newly walking toddler. I checked up and down the hallway. Then, in the corner of my eye, I see this little big dude attempting to maneuver the steps on our porch. It was scary, though I’m laughing about it now.

#44 – It’s hard to have your wife check your sleep pattern when she’s on the lower half of the world. Sorry Doc!

A few weeks back I had some minor heart issues! Chest pain for 8 hours thanks to a day of six slices of spicy pizza, 20 ounces of Pepsi, a big leg of chicken, washed down with more Pepsi, followed by two brownies and multiple scoops of ice cream. Yah … my GERD was acting up again! I had my follow up last week and everything seems to be going well. I’ve lost weight, I’m exercising on a somewhat regular basis, I’ve cut out pop for the most part (if I do breakdown it’s never at night) and I’m not snacking as late (blame this on Lis and her addiction to late-night munchies). Still he asked about my sleep patterns. He thinks I may have sleep apnea. I think I may have sleep apnea. He asked if my wife could watch me sleep. I frowned and said, “I’ll tell her.” I’m sure Lis is looking forward to that when she returns!

#43 – I can watch sports documentaries without interruption.

I rented about 15 30-for-30 ESPN documentaries. They are interesting! I cried watching the Hang Gathers episode, I laughed and related to the episode about fantasy baseball … it’s been fun. I’m sure Lis wouldn’t mind sitting through a few of these but she’s not the biggest of sports fans so most she’d find boring. I think they’re fun!

#42 – It’s be nice to have the rest of the Johnson 5 to hang out with while hanging at the Sky Valley Insurance booth at this weekend’s Sultan Shindig.

At least Erik and his Everything Art Studio was next door. At least my Grandparents were in town to relieve us if needed. Even Dad, Josh, Ian and Wes stopped by to man the booths for a few minutes. Still, it’d be a great time to have Lis and I (and the kids) out in the community, shaking hands and kissing babies!

#41 – The Shindig confirms why I love living in a small town. Good people, old friends, new friends and fun!

I love the small town atmosphere and if you live in Sultan it doesn’t get much better than that. We went out to the local tavern, the Loggers Inn on Friday night. On Saturday night we went back and it was packed. The fun part was that you see so many people you know, or you knew 10-plus years ago, or that used to be clients of yours, or that you may have run across in town somewhere. It was so easy to bounce from social circle to social circle talking with people. I love getting to know people and this was so easy to do during Shindig weekend. We even partied like Sultanites by going to a bonfire in town and hanging out until 4am. Great time, good people! Thanks all for welcoming me!

Oh, and we had our “YMCA” rerun for the City of Sultan. The crowd was packed. It was so fun seeing everyone’s faces, watching them laugh, taking pictures with them afterwards. Great time! Thank you Sultan, you were great!

#40 – Beans and rice sound pretty darn good after 2-1/2 days of carnival food!

Too bad I don’t make beans and rice like the wife! I am craving some rice with ham and cheese! Yum! Sure carnival food is OK. Gyro, teriyaki, personal pan pizza, hamburger, corn on the cob … wow, I ate too much! But nothing tops the cooking of my wife. I’ve lucky and blessed that she knows how to throw down in the kitchen. I must be hungry because I’m craving her Stevanato Pizza more than her! Lunch time!

There you have it! Nos. 49-40! What will Nos. 39-30 bring? It’ll bring one more month until I’m back to normal again! Until then! The Force will be with You – always!


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