Another odd and disturbing story that I will not share with Lis. The Boss Lady knew of someone that went through chemo. A client in the office. She decided to call this client. The client’s husband answered the phone and told her that the client had passed away last Saturday. Ouch! What exactly did she have? The Boss Lady slowly wrote down the letters A-M-L, my heart dropped. I wanted to leave. She had battled this cancer for five years.
Just a couple of minutes ago I nominated Lis for a Mom Give-Away through Red Robin. I thought about nominating my Mom, as she has been super in helping Lis and me out with Lukas. In the end, I chose Lis, cause if anybody is going to need a spa getaway it’s my Lisy. We’re going to need a vacation after this. I’m exhausted, frustrated and again all of those negative adjectives used to describe the situation.
Lis constantly has a fever. 103-97-101-99-104…104!!! That’s right, she is boiling inside. She has to have ice packs under her arms, Tylenol and antibiotics. I have to keep telling myself that this is what’s supposed to happen. It’s just her body battling the chemo. I can’t believe…I still can’t believe it. Lis has cancer. No friggin’ way!
Sorry, I’m frustrated, exhausted…oh did we go over this already? I need to punch something or get wasted, isn’t that bad that that is how I feel? I think so.
Lukas is still a trooper. I put him in bed with me in the middle of the night and we cuddle together. He’s so darn cute.
I’m still getting free food from churches. The ladies at church made Lukas and Lis nice quilts. my coworker is putting donations around town. People are nice. However, I still haven’t heard from my wife’s boss at Moneytree. It’s almost time to raise hell.
How am I holding up? Not so good. I play it off real well, but times like these when it’s quiet and lonely at home I feel like crying. I see Lis lying in bed, know it’s probably better that I go, but can’t bring myself to. I take forever leaving. I want to just cuddle up next to her with our lil’ guy, fall asleep and wake up in bed with her. Like it’s been one long nightmare. Something that made me realize how great life is and that I should enjoy it every day rather than worrying about working two jobs. A nightmare that makes me realize how wonderful my life is. I have a wonderful wife and a beautiful brilliant son!